It's beautiful, you can turn mistakes to miracles...

I've always stunk at juggling, like seriously, it just doesn't work for me. =P But yeah, I don't know why I started thinking about this, but I did and I realized I've been juggling a lot lately, without really even noticing it. I'll be holding onto something with my right hand, and thats where my focus is, and of course I know I need to let that go. So when I do let it go, when I throw that out, maybe, just maybe for a split second I'll feel free... Yet as I was focusing on whatever I was holding onto with my right hand, I failed to pay attention to what my left hand was grabbing. Then, before I even realize whats happening, that ends up in my right hand, and now my focus is off again, as I start holding tightly onto that. And it becomes a cycle, with the same few issues, letting go of one, grabbing onto another, letting go of that then grabbing something else. I guess I've kind of made myself believe that I have to always be holding onto one of them, that I can't ever be free from it all. But now, as my hands are occupied in this juggling, how can I really do anything? I'm too distracted trying to keep this constant game going that I forget what is really important. How can I possibly grasp God's plans when I'm too busy trying to play this game? I just can't, theres no way to grasp onto both at the same time. And maybe thats what I need to realize, God doesn't want us to be so focused on trying to let go of everything and get stuck in this cycle, not at all. He wants us to give it ALL to Him, let Him take care of it so that we can continue on the journey He has for us... We can be His hands only if we release what we're holding into His hands... but am I ready to do that? Is there any getting ready to do anyways? Whatever happened to "come just as you are." No, theres nothing left to do. Let go and let God. That's it. So why is it so hard to do?